I go to the coffee establishment often, almost every day, for my work. It is very important for my concentration that I have my own space and my own routine. I arrive usually around 8:00 AM, just as they are opening, so I can choose the table that is most suitable for my needs. It is a corner table, quite large, with good light, and importantly, it has two chairs. This is essential for me.
My work requires much organization. I use my laptop, of course, but also an external keyboard and a mouse, because the built-in ones are not good for my wrist. I also have many papers, important documents that I must review. These papers are spread out around my laptop so I can see everything at once. Sometimes I have printouts, sometimes reports, sometimes my personal journal for ideas. It is a system I have developed for maximum efficiency. My large bag, which carries all my equipment and papers, also needs a place. It is not a small bag, it is a professional bag for my materials.
So, my setup looks like this: laptop, external keyboard, mouse, and many papers on the main table space. My bag, which is quite full and heavy, rests on the second chair. This is not because I am trying to be rude, but because it is too large to fit under my small portion of the table, and it is uncomfortable to have it on the floor where it could be kicked or get dirty. Also, I often bring two beverages – one coffee for waking up, and one tea for later, for calming the mind. And sometimes a pastry or a fruit, so there are plates and cups. You see, it is a full workstation for serious work.
This morning, everything was as usual. I arrived early, set up my space, and was deeply immersed in a complex report. The coffee establishment was getting busier, which happens. I noticed that all other tables were occupied. Then, a woman, maybe in her late 20s or early 30s, approached my table. She was carrying her own coffee and looked around, clearly searching for a place to sit.
She looked at my table, then at the chair where my bag was resting. She asked me, “Is this chair free?”
I looked up, a little surprised, as I was in the middle of a very difficult calculation. I said, “No, I am using it. It is for my bag and my documents.” I gestured to my spread-out papers and my bag on the chair. I thought this was very clear.
She paused. Then she said, “But the place is completely full. You are using two chairs for one person.”
I explained to her again. “I need this space for my work. My bag is very important, it has all my professional tools. And my papers need room. I have a lot of things. I came here early to secure this spot specifically because I need this setup.” I tried to be patient, but I felt she was not understanding my situation.
She became a little bit agitated. She said, “It’s not fair to other customers. You should only take one chair.”
I felt this was very rude of her. I responded, “I am also a customer. I pay for my coffee and my food, just like you. I arrived here first. I have established my workspace. It is not my fault that the establishment is busy. Perhaps you should come earlier if you need a specific type of seat.” I thought this was a logical and reasonable point.
She just stood there for a moment, looking at me with what I can only describe as a very sour expression. She did not say anything more, but her gaze was very strong, like she was trying to burn a hole through me. It made me feel very uncomfortable. Eventually, she sighed very loudly and walked away, going to stand by the counter, probably waiting for someone else to leave. I saw her glance back at my table a few times.
Later, as I was packing up, I noticed the barista giving me a rather cold look as I passed by the counter. I do not know why. I have always been a polite customer. I always clean up my own mess, put my cups in the tray. I did nothing wrong.
I was there first. I need the space for my important work. It is not my responsibility to manage the seating for the entire coffee establishment. I am paying for my space, for my time, for my coffee. She was the one who was interrupting my concentration and being demanding. It felt like she wanted me to rearrange my entire essential setup just for her convenience.
Am I The Jerk? I really do not think so, but maybe I am missing something. Please tell me honestly what you think.
